Issue #8 · Eat, Sleep, Write, Repeat
As a self-diagnosed perfectionist, sometimes I struggle to hit publish. Here's how I'm grappling with that.
Emily Ann Hill
May 15, 2023
May 15, 2023: This morning, I woke up super disappointed in myself.
This morning, I woke up and realized that today is May 15th — that’s officially mid-May for those keeping score at home.
Now, people always say “time’s flying, I can’t believe it’s already [Month X]!!” in passing conversation and water-cooler small talk, but for some reason, seeing that date on my phone background hit me like a ton of bricks.
At the beginning of the year, I promised myself that throughout 2023, I would write every single morning with the goal of publishing this newsletter once every two weeks-ish. Now, while I do write most mornings, if you check the date of my last issue, you’ll see that this ambitious biweekly publishing goal has totally fallen by the wayside, as well-intentioned New Year’s Resolutions often go.
I initially set this goal because I find writing to be therapeutic. It helps me sort out my thoughts, it acts as a pseudo-therapist and is something I just genuinely enjoy. In fact, I have a several-years-old, long-running word doc that’s currently over 119k words and 176 pages — it’s really more of a personal diary at this point. On an ideal morning, I grab a cup of coffee, fire it up, and write down whatever is on my mind — sometimes it’s just a sentence or two, and sometimes three full pages flow out. I also keep several physical journals, and I’m pretty much a hoarder of cute notebooks and stationery.
The thing is, I also find writing to be almost entirely a factor of momentum. It’s no coincidence that the days when I don’t even open my Word Doc Dairy™ are the same days that I don’t end up writing anything at all. That’s why this morning, in my moment of holy-shit-it’s-already-mid-May panic, I cleared my to-do list, poured a cup of coffee (and a second, and a third), and just started writing. Like a diet that’s been ruined by an irresistible molten chocolate lava cake or that gym membership that’s collecting dust, the only thing you can do is get back on the wagon.
The problem however, was that just a few hours ago, I was feeling completely uninspired and had no topic in mind to write about — but I knew that I just needed to write something, anything.
Now, there’s a few reasons why I haven’t been in the mood to write. Much of my past writing has been about my wacky nomadic lifestyle, something that I haven’t been doing quite as much of lately. I’ve also been dedicating most of my extra free time towards growing my e-commerce business, which is still going slow but steady, tysm for asking. And just like anyone else, I often lose steam on goals because “life happens” or I simply “get busy” — but the truth is, is that the one thing I do have right now is an abundance of time and, apparently, shitty excuses.
I want to write, and in order to do that, I must show up every single day, even when I have no idea what to say. But by opening up a blank page and just letting words pour out of me in unexpected directions, I know that I’ll eventually latch onto something of substance. As a self-diagnosed perfectionist, sometimes I struggle to hit publish. But a mediocre piece that’s out in the world is still better than a brilliant piece that’s sitting in my drafts, so my mantra going forwards will be something along the lines of “ship more, share more” (it’s a working title).
So this isn’t my best piece — in fact, I feel like I haven’t even said much of anything. But for the sake of momentum, here it is, a shiny new issue of Extracurricular Pursuits out the door, momentum re-established. Just getting this far feels like I’ve unclogged some of my creativity pipes, because I’m already ruminating on a few new ideas for the next topic, which feel like they’ve suddenly been delivered to my mental doorstep out of thin air. Funny how it works, that the more you write, the more you have to write about.
Thanks for reading along.
Help Me Continue Writing 📝 💛
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PS: I’d love to hear what you thought about this post. If this landed in your inbox, just hit reply! Or if you’re reading this online, send me an email at [email protected] and I pinky promise I’ll reply back.
Here’s a list of every issue if you want to keep reading!
Issue #16: Embracing the Blank Canvas [Sep 2023]
Issue #15: In Pursuit of an Endless Summer [Aug 2023]
Issue #14: Follow Me to Weird Places [Jul 2023]
Issue #13: Self-Inflicted Social Overload [Jul 2023]
Issue #12: Schlepping It 🎒 [Jun 2023]
Issue #11: Finding My “Next Thing” [Jun 2023]
Issue #10: Book the Damn Flight and Just Go [May 2023]
Issue #9: Choosing Your Own Life Adventure [May 2023]
Issue #8: Eat, Sleep, Write, Repeat [May 2023]
Issue #7: My First Month of Indie Making: An Honest Review [Feb 2023]
Issue #6: Ten Years of Making Money on the Internet [Jan 2023]
Issue #5: The Modern-Day Mission Trip [Dec 2022]
Issue #4: Ready, FIRE!, Aim [Nov 2022]
Issue #3: A New City Every Month: An Experiment in Change [Aug 2022]
Issue #2: Defining My North Star as a Nomad [Dec 2021]
Issue #1: One Year on the Road: Looking Back [Oct 2021]
